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Long time no chit-chat? [07 May 2009|10:30pm] [ mood | drained ] [ music | Resident evil in the background ] So I haven't been here in a long time. Don't really know who still writes in theirs or if anyone will ever read mine again. Mostly I need to write a little bit for myself since that's what I used to do. Need to vent... LiveJournal it. :] -Sigh- I have been seeing the same guy for almost two years. Yeah I know, big surprise. But we have settled down after many many months of insanity. He was my backbone during rough, complicated living. Not so much living as trying to survive. I loved him because he was my best friend. I loved everything about him. And because I am a fucked up, angry, empty girl... I threw that all away. I pushed him  away a little more every single day and I know I did. I screamed, and did everything except be a good girlfriend. He deserves so much better and I know that. It's awful that I was so awful. I can't even believe it got so bad. I am a callous rude little girl. And now that I have come to these conclusions it's waaaaay to late. He has already made it completely clear as to how he feels about me. He never wants to see me again, let alone be with me. And I can't fix that. I suck. I am so lost, I don't even know what I'm here for. :[ post comment

[11 Jan 2008|06:53pm] Longtime no update? I've been busy. Things are well. I love my juggalo. <3. post comment

[12 Dec 2007|08:32pm] I can't wait until my baby comes back to Washington. Sleeping by yourself at night can make you feel alone. Two weeks. <3. 1 comment|post comment

[25 Nov 2007|10:46pm] [ mood | contemplative ] Donny and I are back together. I guess it's sort of a trial so that we can attempt to work things out. Other then that... nothing has happened. <3. post comment

[23 Nov 2007|02:54am] Today did not go as planned. Everyone came over, shit went down, and Donny broke up with me. Damn. FB. </3. post comment

You know who you are. Obviously this is not towards everyone who reads it. [20 Nov 2007|10:57pm] [ mood | exanimate ] [ music | $50 - ICP. <3. ] You're all fucking idiots. Like do you get bored or something and just need to stir up the drama-pot? Now I remember why I broke away. Because there is always someone lying, or spreading business that isn't theirs, or needing attention. [and I wont try to say that it was never me.] I want to stab you all. I hate how we glorified our twofaced backstabbing relationships. I hate how we pretended to like everyone in le crew. I hate how we played each others little manipulative mind games, and then bitched about it later. I hated us. But on a better note. I love my boyfriendJuggalo and my two lovers. And I am really really excited for Thanksgiving/Heroin's birthday. It's going to be amazing. Oh! and I got given a song today. Haha. Well I guess not the whole song, just the first verse. "Momma don't like this wicked clown I might come from the dark side of town When she's gone and you're alone again 50 bucks says you'll let me in" Do you know the rest of the lyrics Ninja..? I bet not, because you suck ass. 5 comments|post comment

Drama drama drama. [09 Nov 2007|12:57am] [ mood | Savage. ] [ music | Toybox - ICP. <3. ] I knew when all the boys came back there was gunna be trouble. Oh gosh.. At least I feel like I have a steady group of friends again? Even if they do consist of 5 guys, and 2 primates. ..And Donny keeps freaking out on Brandon. Over everything. And anytime we are around each other. Daaaaamnnn. Anyways, other then stupid boys getting mad over stupid things.. well I was going to try to say something postitive, but everything else sucks too. I need a break. 2 comments|post comment

Fuck Brandon. [05 Nov 2007|02:22am] No, I don't want to talk about it. Fuck my dad. No, I don't want to talk about it. I'm dating Donny. No, I don't want to talk about it... He's been sweet. It's different. 2 comments|post comment

[27 Oct 2007|11:40pm] I'm sick of life and liars. I need something real again. Go Ask Alice, <3. post comment

[24 Oct 2007|03:59pm] Pretty much done with that one for the moment. I still really like him, but I'm stressed. Maybe soon? <3. post comment

For those who haven't played the game. [08 Oct 2007|01:52pm] ( Screenshots. ) 1 comment|post comment

[26 Sep 2007|01:38pm] I finally found the one. Cream. but I'm wearing nets, not those checkered ones. 10 comments|post comment

[23 Sep 2007|01:20pm] long time no update? Yeah I am too busy with all the homework I have. I've only had one free day... ..Plus when I'm not doing homework, I'm with Tim or the family. .....even though Tim is a uber jerk, and I spend more time frustrated then lustful. We aren't really talking now, but I wonder how long that will last. I miss freshman year. :[ Let's hang? post comment

I will never get married. [02 Sep 2007|09:10am] [ mood | This doesn't have SAVAGE. Damn ] ( Unless I get this.. ) I'm not fucking joking. 2 comments|post comment

[24 Aug 2007|06:52am] I wish things were going the way that they were around new years. </3. post comment

[18 Aug 2007|05:03am] I am fucking pissed. Hope everyone else is having a blast this weekend. </3. Fuck. post comment

[14 Aug 2007|04:34am] Hempfest on Saturday. Nice. That means, Brandon on Saturday. <3. 2 comments|post comment

Ohhh... [13 Aug 2007|03:37pm] And, I fucked up my right knee. I don't know how or when. It hurts like a bitch. post comment

[13 Aug 2007|03:13pm] 'Member how I said I was having weird dreams? Well, I still am. But the one last night was an amazing weird. They all have people that I haven't seen since freshman year. I miss him. I would totally hang out with him if I could. Things were easyish, and fun. I don't care that none of you liked him then. You are the ones that ruined it, it would have at least stayed good till he left. post comment

[11 Aug 2007|09:09pm] I hate being on a diet. Among other things.. post comment

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